social-media – Emma Palmer-Cooper

Are you Ego scrolling

As featured in Stylist, July 2025

Dating apps can be fun and even a way to improve our wellbeing, but only if we stay in control of how we use them.

Dating apps can be validating

One of our core psychological needs as humans is a sense of belonging and acceptance. Dating apps can offer this through validation of a person’s attractiveness and social worth, as well as finding connection.

When used in a balanced way, this social validation can enhance wellbeing, boost self-esteem, and foster a sense of fulfilment, while also reducing feelings of loneliness.

Dating apps can lead to bad habits

Positive experiences of validation or wellbeing boosts can reinforce scrolling on dating apps, turning it into a habit. If left unchecked, this can lead to excessive use, which may have the opposite effect on wellbeing. Research has shown that compulsive Tinder use is linked to low mood, poor self-esteem, and reduced life satisfaction.

If you notice that scrolling leaves you feeling worse rather than better, it might be time to pause or set limits on how often you use these apps.

How to reset your ego scrolling

The best way to address this is by asking yourself why you’re scrolling, and how you feel in the moment. It’s a process that takes practice and conscious effort, but it pays off when you learn to recognise and change unhelpful habits.

If you notice yourself scrolling on dating apps without a clear purpose, try deliberately switching to something else. Research suggests that positive emotions help us recover more quickly from negative experiences, so choosing something fulfilling can be very effective.

Setting clear boundaries around when and how long you scroll can also help prevent negative patterns. For example, you could pick a specific time of day to open a dating app, allowing yourself a finite window before moving on to something else. Setting an app time limit using your phone’s settings can be an effective way to manage this.

You might also choose to do something enjoyable straight after using the app, giving you more motivation to stick to your boundaries. Alternatively, you could positively reinforce your limits by rewarding yourself when you keep to your set time.

If you need tips for building happy habits, I’ve provided some here!

digital boundaries, emotional-wellbeing, mental wellbeing, mental-health

Creating digital boundaries for your mental health

As featured in Women’s Health; 13th May 2025

While technology has improved access to information and made life easier in many ways, it requires finding a balance. Smartphones have created both benefits and challenges in daily life.

After having my daughter, during a baby first-aid course, I was told my smartphone was the most powerful tool I could have on me if she suddenly fell poorly – you can ring someone for help immediately and search what to do while waiting. However ease of access to online spending has increased challenges faced by people experiencing gambling addiction and impulsive spending.

The pandemic drastically changed smartphone usage patterns, leading to increased reliance on digital communication to stay in touch with friends and family, and also adapt to working at home. But many people also experienced an increase in screen fatigue.

This can be addresed at work by doing things like blocking out time in your calendar so you know you won’t be called into a zoom meeting, or making space to move, breathe, or just take a break from your screen.

Research has shown associations between problematic phone use and conditions like anxiety and depression, though the causality remains unclear. There are suggestions that this relationship becomes cyclical, where anxiety leads to increased phone use, as with doom scrolling, which in turn fuels more anxiety. Other research shows that doomscrolling can enhance feelings of anxiety.

Identifying problematic use is about understanding how and why you’re using your phone. Are you picking it up out of necessity or habit? If you’ve set aside time to reply to messages, do you put your phone down afterwards or do you start scrolling mindlessly?

Setting boundaries with smartphone use is really important. Knowing if you have a tendency to use your phone in ways that don’t benefit you, such as spending money or losing time when scrolling, means you can start to set boundaries with a timer or “buy later” list.

There are some simple practical strategies you can use to start enforcing these boundaries, like blocking out specific times in your calendar for scrolling, messages or checking up on news.

Try turning off notification for everything, except emergency contacts, during working hours and when you go to sleep to avoid getting distracted. Carve out a specific time to respond, such as at lunchtime.

If you find yourself picking up your phone out of habit, try swapping it for another activity. The required conscious decision-making about when and how to use smartphones, but can lead to huge improvements in your wellbeing and provide more balance in your life.

Try the Happy Habits box to learn news ways to build resilience and wellbeing.

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Doomscrolling, Brain Rot, and how to stop

Doomscrolling is the habit of endlessly scrolling through online media, consuming unfulfilling content and bad news. Whilst it might feel almost addictive, research has shown that the fear of missing out or being uninformed drives people’s inability to stop scrolling.

The fear of missing out comes from feelings of uncertainty and anxiety about current events, where consuming more information makes people temporarily feel more certain and in control. When algorithmic recommendations and ‘endless’ feeds then present similar content, we may experience excessive scrolling.

Being immersed in negative news may feel like it keeps us informed, but over time this has a negative impact on our psychological wellbeing and overall life satisfaction. Research has shown that people who spent just a few minutes daily consuming negative news feeds experienced fewer positive emotions, less optimism, and more negative emotions than people who did not.

What’s the difference between Doomscrolling and Brain Rot?

Both doomscrolling and brain rot are linked to lower wellbeing, and anxiety when not using a phone. Research has shown that overall excessive internet use in younger people is related to a reduction in the brains ability to processes reward, and regulate behaviour and emotion regulation.

How can we become more aware and stop doomscrolling?

You don’t have to ditch technology to break a scrolling habit – regardless of what content you are consuming. It’s all about being self-aware by asking yourself why you’re using your phone, and how you feel. This takes practice and a conscious effort to recognise and change habits.

If you notice you are scrolling with no clear purpose and feel unfulfilled, you can switch to something more intentional. Research shows that positive emotions help us recover more quickly from negative experiences, so choosing activities that genuinely uplift you can make a real difference.

Setting clear boundaries on when and how long you use your phone can help reduce scrolling, and build healthier habits. Having an enjoyable alternative activity will make this easier. To really reinforce this habit, you can reward yourself each time you make the choice to say ‘No’ to scrolling.

Try This: Happy Habits & Positive Postcards

If you’re looking to build these practices into daily life, check out the Happy Habits Box – a toolkit designed to help you find joy in the everyday. Positive postcards provide ideas and guidance for small, everyday activities to promote positivity.